“….today!?!” “Gerald?” “Yeah!” I grumble. Sweet Baby Jesus it’s early. “Do you want to keep the car today? “Uhhhhhhhhhh…………..nah, I’m good.” I finally manage to get my brain to pass along the info to my mouth that it had some things it needed to do. “You sure? Ok, have a good day!” She screams at an excrutiatingly painful level as she walks out the door. “You too!” I groan, rolling over to pretend I can squeeze a few more hours of sleep into another rainy humid summer morning. After 5 minutes of trying to force myself to go back to sleep, I admit my defeat. It’s just too hot. I got a next level sweaty swamp thing going on with my shorts. It’s like a cookie that’s been left in milk to long, the top is fine but the bottom is just a soggy mess. I roll over to my back and kick the blanket off to try and cool off. A few seconds of staring at the ceiling, breathing like I just ran a marathon, deep breath in through the nose….hold…..out through the mouth, and I’m ready to get out of bed. Ready to take on the world and every challenge it can throw at me. Or whatever I can find on Netflix. I stop by the kitchen to grab some coffee and a protein bar. The kind of pseudo heathy bar that taste way too much like peanut butter cake to actually be good for you. I finally make it to my place of rest after the long journey, snacks in hand. This is it; this is the place where I will spend the next 10 hours, my fortress of solitude, the recliner. I start going through Netflix looking for something to watch. I call it the Netflix shuffle. It’s where you scroll through Netflix adding random shows, movies, documentaries, comedy special, and anime to your list of things to watch. Then you just turn on The Office for the 27th time. It’s so much fun. Dwight is just about to torch the door handle, and I notice the only light in the house that’s on, flickers. It’s not unusual; it looks like it’s about to storm. I go back to the TV. Dwight just started a fire in the trashcan, when the TV turns off briefly and the light flickers again. The power seems like it’s definitely going to go out, so I pull out my phone. Open up Netflix and tap play. The screen starts flashing….well then, that’s…..not….normal…….. “Gerald?” I wake up and I’m sitting at my desk, with the guy I share an office with standing in front of me staring like he had just seen Sasquatch. “….” I just stare off past him. “It’s Friday; I thought you were off today?” He says, still just staring at me. I look down to find that wearing only the shorts I had on when I got up this morning. Awesome. “Yeah, I thought so too.” Trying to play it cool while I rack my brain trying to figure out what I was doing there. “I uhh…..I should probably…go.” I mutter. How the…did I get here. It’s a 30 minute drive and I didn’t keep the car today, so I didn’t drive here. I haven’t walked more than a mile in the past…..2…8…28 years, so that’s out. There is no way this is real. “It is Friday, right?” I ask. So freaking confused. “Yeah, all day.” Pretty confused as well. “Uh…What time is it?” I ask. Thinking that might provide info on what’s going on. “7:02.” 7:02… I went across town in…2 minutes. “You know you’re not wearing a shirt?....Or Shoes?” “What? Ah, Yeah, Whatever. 7:02?” “Are you sure you’re feeling ok?” “I’m…maybe…I’m not sure. I’m going to call someone to come pick me up.” I start to reach into my pocket and notice I’m still holding my phone. I unlock to find The Office is paused about where I left off. Angela has just thrown her cat up into the celling to Oscar. I have to call my mom to come get me. I probably need to go to the hospital. I hear my coworker mumble something getting our boss. “Sure, ok” I say distractedly. I tap the home button to leave Netflix and open the phone app and dial mom. “Hey Bud!” She answers. “Hey…” Don’t freak out. Don’t freak out. Don’t freak out. Don’t freak out. “Don’t freak out, but I need you to come pick me up.” “Why!?! What’s wrong??” She’s worried. “I just, feel weird…” Don’t freak out. “Ok, I’m leaving now. Give me….” “Mom…” I cut her off. “I’m not home. I’m at work…I need you to pick me up from my office.” She is going to freak out. “Your office? What are you doing….How did you get to work?” I’m not sure how to answer this. “You are messing with me aren’t you?” “No, not this time. I can’t really explain, but I’m at work” I’m freaking out, now. “But, you didn’t keep the car today?” Alright, she is freaking out now for sure. “Yeah, I know. Can you please just come get me?” “Ok, I’m on my way, but we are going to talk about what is going on!” “Thank you!” I hang up. I’m shaking now. I’m staring at my blank phone completely lost. I probably had a stroke or something. I open up chrome and do a search for stroke symptoms. Surprisingly, not being sure how you got to work isn’t listed. F.A.S.T doesn’t include identifying how a fat hairy man showed up at the office. Who would have guessed it…I tap to display all open apps and then close all. My phone starts flashing. The annoying fluorescent light above my desk starts flickering, more than what was typical. Oh great!........ Go, go Power Rangers! do, do, do, do, do Go, go Power Rangers! You Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers! I’m standing back in my living room holding my phone. 42 missed calls, 38 voicemails, and 76 texts. Not cool. Go, go Power Rangers! *do….It is my mom calling for the 43rd time. “Hello?” Seriously WTF is going on today? “Where are you? Why didn’t you answer my calls? I’m sitting in front of your office. This isn’t funny, Gerald!” She’s pissed. Rightfully so. “Sorry…I…I’m at home.” I say, as I look around and randomly touch things to be sure. The wall…feels like a wall. Chair is chair. Coffee is cold….taking a big swig….but still coffee. “Gerald, I don’t have time for this!!! WHAT.IS.GOING.ON!!!” Now, she is pissed for sure. ”You better not be screwing with me…” “Im not. Seriously! I need you to come home, something weird is happening and I’m freaking out!” Bring a young priest and an old priest. “Mom?” She hung up. Hopefully she is on her way here. I get another text, that’s 77 for the day. Probably the most I’ve ever had. I start going through them and they are a lot of the same. Mom asking where I am, what is going on, and why am I not answering. A couple from my brothers and sister asking the same questions, but with gifs and memes mixed in as needed. John Travolta’s character from Pulp Fiction walking around arms outstretched and a couple of annoyed Arthur fists. Then there are a few from my Dad saying to call Mom. The next one is from my boss saying “We need to talk” on Monday about the “dress code”. A dozen more messages from irate and hysterical family members that I can ignore. Then number 77, from UNKNOWN. UNKNOWN – Having a fun morning? LOL Uhhh…What….That has to be a coincidence. Gerald – Who is this? UNKNOWN – A friend Nah, GTFO! Gerald – I’m going to need a little more info than that. Gerald – Where do I know you from? Gerald – How did you get this number? This is crazy… UNKNOWN – I know you’re going to have trouble believing this but stay with me. UNKNOWN – You stumbled into something today that only one other person has found. AFAIK… UNKNOWN – It was dumb luck this time. It will take you several years to do it again. UNKNOWN – And it will be a few more after that before you can control it. Come on, Dude!!! Gerald – Come on, Dude! UNKNOWN – I get it. It’s creepy. And the award for understatement of the year goes to…. UNKNOWN – There is code embedded inside of Netflix and you inadvertently activated it. UNKNOWN – I’m not sure who put it there or why, but it’s there. This guy is insane… Gerald – You’re full of it! Gerald – I’ve read that book. LOL. Guy finds code to manipulate reality, travels in time, and is a wizard. Gerald – Cool story bro! This is a poor attempt at trolling. UNKNOWN – I’m starting to think it wasn’t just a story, but can’t confirm that yet. UNKNOWN – Look, I don’t know how it works, but there is a series of actions you can perform in Netflix UNKNOWN – When done in the right order it takes you to a different place. Gerald – Teleporting…You expect me to believe a rando that says Netflix lets you teleport… Gerald – Nah! For those reasons, I’m out! UNKNOWN – You didn’t keep the car today, right? WHAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa….How did they know that? Gerald – Are you stalking me? UNKNOWN - So, that’s a yes. Gerald – I didn’t say that… UNKNOWN – Ok, this is the first time it’s been found. You have a while before you hit it again. UNKNOWN – If it takes you as long as it took me, then we’ll talk again in 4 years. UNKNOWN – We are almost out of time. UNKNOWN – Don’t worry about everything that happened today. UNKNOWN – Error detection has already picked up on this and a reboot has been started. UNKNOWN – Everything resets, but there will be pointers to today. Sort of like déjà vu. UNKNOWN – Make note of these. THEY ARE IMPORTANT! UNKNOWN – Talk soon Gerald – Dude. What are you talking about??? Gerald – Let’s pretend everything you said is true… Gerald – Why don’t you just tell me the code? Gerald – Who are you? Gerald – How did you know? Gerald – How did you know I didn’t keep the car today? “….today!?!” “Gerald?” “Yeah!” I grumble. Dadgum, it’s early. “Do you want to keep the car today?
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from Short Stories https://ift.tt/2Dy3uGV
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